A Mon Avis...

What are a tenant's rights?

2012-02-03T16:28:00.000-08:00

I've decided to dedicate a post to this question: what are a resident's rights and exactly how much power does the landlord have?

My boyfriend and I moved into our current apartment on November 1st of last year. Upon move in, we noticed a couple of problems that we noted on our move-in inspection sheet. One was the sink in the wet bar. It's a shame that we have not yet been able to use this sink, since it was the attribute that we were most excited about. Second, the faucet in our bathroom leaks non-stop. Our efforts to fix these ourselves have proven futile and there has been no attempt in the last 3 months by maintenance to fix them either.

The third and I would say most dangerous problem is the light in our hallway. A couple of weeks after move-in, it stopped working. We have since had to bear with a dark stairway, often using the light from our phones to make our way up and down. Every call to the office was met with unkept promises such as "I'll get someone there today."

A week ago, the maintenance guys came in for pest control and we took the opportunity to question them about their ability to take care of their residents. They apologized profusely and said the light in the hallway would get taken care of "that day." It is now a week later and the stairway is still dark.

Most recently, my boyfriend and I noticed that they were undergoing a project to fix the covered parking areas. For some reason or another, most of them have a leg that has been completely bent in. They have put caution tape on all of them, discouraging residents from parking there and today we heard them drilling quite a bit into the concrete. My boyfriend and I are betting that we will still be seeing the caution tape for the next month.

Neither my boyfriend nor I have ever lived in a place quite like this before. In our previous apartments, maintenance matters were always handled within a couple of days. We took a look at our leasing agreement for some answers and found that these landlords seem to have covered themselves pretty well, using the phrase "within a reasonable amount of time" to attend to maintenance requests. Who can, in fact, determine what a "reasonable amount of time" is?

The sad part is, it isn't just us. People everywhere are dealing with this same sort of neglect from their landlords. And the landlords continue to get away with it. In time, I am determined to find a way to settle the score. I just need to keep looking.

What happened to the movies?

2012-01-20T15:51:00.001-08:00

Is it just me, or has Hollywood fallen into a bit of a slump lately? I remember a time when there were at least two films a month that I was dying to see. Now, it seems that I only get that feeling about twice a year. Is it me or has Hollywood lost its mojo?

It seems to me that today’s movies are either recycled stories from books or biographies of a deceased celebrity. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but what about novelty? Aren’t there any new or exciting ideas left?

Last night, I saw Sherlock Holmes 2. Now don’t get me wrong, I very much enjoyed it. Robert Downey, Jr. is such a talented actor and always brings so much to his roles. The plot moved quickly, the dialogue was good, but it didn’t have that...pizzaz. I didn’t get that feeling I did when I first saw The Lord of the Rings or Indiana Jones. Again, it was very good...but not great.

A little while before that, I saw The Descendants. It too was a good movie. George Clooney is an amazing actor and I liked the chemistry he has with his on-screen daughters. It was, however, quite depressing and I didn’t feel as though it had much story to it.

I’m left wondering if all the extraordinary movies have already been created. Maybe the key is simply hitting the video store to find one you haven’t seen before. As for myself, perhaps I’ll give Hollywood one more shot to knock my socks off. Hey, they’ve done it before.

You Don't Watch Salsa, A Short Story

2011-12-25T20:57:00.000-08:00

Going through some old documents, I stumbled upon one of my first short stories. This was written as a class exercise in completing a story in less than 1,000 words. Enjoy!

You Don't Watch Salsa

“Find your center. Breathe and relax,” said the lean, middle-aged woman roaming the room full of adults all bent over in the child’s pose.
Regina took a breath obediently. She pictured the stress of her recent divorce filling her lungs and then evaporating into nothing as she exhaled.
As the instructor had the class switch positions, Regina couldn’t help but glance in the mirror. She sighed.
Before the divorce, she’d considered herself moderately attractive, despite having aged slightly past her “golden years.” She had long, auburn hair and deep-brown eyes which her husband used to tell her could stop a man dead in his tracks.
For the past few months, whenever Regina looked in the mirror, she saw only worried eyes in the face of an aging divorcee. That younger woman was long gone now.
When class was over, Regina packed up her things and headed out toward the street. She took the fresh air deep in her lungs. It felt nice having control over her life again.
On her walk home, Regina passed the small dance studio she’d noticed her second week of yoga class. Every week she paused by the giant window facing the street and admired the salsa dancers. They moved with excitement and passion: emotions Regina had resigned to never feel again.
There was another reason Regina couldn’t help but stop by each week.
The instructor was tall and muscular with a dark complexion, possibly Hispanic. His thick dark hair was disheveled and his forehead shone with a hint of perspiration.
As she was about to walk on, he suddenly glanced her way and flashed a grin. Startled and embarrassed, Regina walked away.
She was half a block down the street when she heard a deep voice behind her, “Wait! Hold on a second.”
Regina turned around to see the man following her. She blushed deeply. “I didn’t mean to stare. I thought I knew someone in there.”
He smiled and ran his hand through his hair. “I’ve seen you here before.”
She blushed again.
He chuckled slightly. “Listen, why don’t you come and join us?”
Regina let out a single laugh. “Me?” She looked down at her feet. “Oh no, I’m not a dancer.”
“You never know,” he persisted with a half-grin. “You could be.”
Regina shook her head. “No. What you’re doing is beautiful, really. Just not for me.” With a polite smile, she turned and walked away. She wasn’t a chance taker and she definitely wasn’t a salsa dancer.
“I’m Juan. Stop by next week.”
*
After a week of being haunted by the memory of Juan, Regina finally decided to visit the dance studio once more. Dressed in a black skirt, red blouse and peep-toe pumps, she pulled her hair back in a bun.
When she arrived at the studio, the class was in the middle of a routine. She snuck quietly into the bright, wood-floor room and sat in the corner.
Juan noticed and waved her toward the front. “Glad you made it. Let me show you what we’re working on.”
“Actually, I just came to watch.” Regina held up her hands.
Juan frowned slightly and shrugged. “If you insist.”
Regina remained seated, enjoying the Latin music and the way the dancers expressed themselves rather than simply following a pattern of footsteps.
Juan twirled a young girl and looked at Regina with devilish eyes. He danced over and, grabbing both her hands, hoisted Regina from off her seat. He looked her dead in the eye and smiled. “You don’t watch salsa.” He grabbed her wrist and whirled her around before she landed perfectly in front of him. “You dance it.”
Despite her inhibitions, Regina’s heart raced. Juan showed her how to move her feet in unison with his. She held her breath as his hands rested on her hips, matching them with the music.
In his arms, Regina had never felt more alive. She felt her anxiety retreat under the covers, letting her body take control. She reached up and pulled the pins out of her bun, letting her hair flow wildly.
Before she knew it, she and Juan were the only ones left on the dance floor. The music stopped and, reluctantly, her body stood still.
Juan gave her a knowing look. “I told you, dancer.”
Regina smiled, her cheeks once again heating. “Thank you. Really. That was the most fun I’ve had in a long time.”
Juan ran a hand through his messy hair before taking a step closer to her. He took her hand and lifted it to his lips. “The pleasure was mine.”
Regina’s stomach did two cartwheels and a somersault.
“You know, there’s a salsa club not far from here,” Juan said. “Would you like to go with me tomorrow night?”
Regina smiled, excited for the first time in months. She nodded. “I’d love that.”
THE END

My Addiction to Facebook

2011-12-25T20:34:00.001-08:00

I am a recovering Facebook addict. I have not made a post in 3 days. Ok, not that impressive, I get it. Still, if you knew the lengths I have gone to and the gravity of the situation from which I am recovering, I think you’d understand.

It all began six years ago, way, way back in 2005. I was in my senior year of high school. My sister was a cool college freshman and had just discovered a new networking tool that was quickly devouring sites like Xanga, Livejournal, and even Myspace. They called it Facebook. The only catch? You had to be invited by a current member.

When I got my invite, I felt like I’d gotten backstage passes to a U2 concert or VIP seats at Paris Hilton’s hangout. I was on top of the world. And what’s more, I discovered during an experiment of friending about 2 dozen of my sister’s acquaintances, that you did not even need to know people to be considered their friend!

Though I wasn’t actually in college and my number of friends was a lie, I still felt good knowing that I was part of something. I had a status. I had 54 friends, and by golly, no way was I turning back.

From there, I began posting incessantly. I quickly discovered that it didn’t mean anything to say what a great time you had at the fair unless you had a picture to show what a great time you had at the fair. I began uploading everything from my main course to my new hair style. Everyday activities became publicity stunts formulated to advertise what a wonderful life I had.

Picture uploading was merely one of the unspoken rules. Statuses were made for the sole purpose of getting others to “like” them and/or comment. They essentially didn’t exist if others didn’t acknowledge that you wrote them. And of course, if you weren’t in a relationship, it was better to pretend. Forming romantic attachments with friends was a viable option, of course. Then there was the “it’s complicated” feature, which was vague enough to keep people guessing.

Likes and comments became food for my soul; a pat on the back for my cleverness and insight into everyday life. Of course, after college, I began to work more and my opportunities to post on Facebook became fewer and fewer. Still, I made a valiant effort, commenting on friends’ posts, updating my status when I got the chance, logging in to Facebook only to refresh the page moments later, hoping for recent activity.

It was around this time that I had my breakthrough. I started to feel disappointment when a status or two when without a single like or comment. I began to look at others’ posts with jealousy. Every party, every promotion a friend highlighted, I looked at with envy, wondering, “Why isn’t that happening to me?”

A friend of mine uploaded a beautiful ring her boyfriend had gotten her. I asked mine why he never bought me anything. I saw photos of friends hanging out and ask myself why I didn’t socialize more often. It was then that I realized: I was putting more energy into my fake life on Facebook than participating in my real one!

I discovered that I can enjoy a party without everyone knowing I attended it. It is possible to take pictures and not upload them for the world to see. And when I realized this, I began to see everything more clearly. And when you think about it, no one posts every job loss, every argument with their significant other, every ailment. They want people to see the good stuff. It was then that I accepted that I was, well, normal.

Someone could be sitting in front of my profile page right now, envying my trips, my family, my boyfriend. But I no longer care. I see Facebook for what it is, and yes, I still log in daily. However, as I continue my road to recovery, I am appreciating more and more just how exciting my life, outside Facebook, really is. No comments or likes necessary.

Article first published as My Addiction to Facebook on Blogcritics.

Last Night On: Kourtney & Kim Take New York

2011-12-19T17:32:00.000-08:00

Last night on Kourtney & Kim Take New York there were house parties, accusations of betrayal and then there were Jews. It was certainly an interesting episode to say the least.

The episode began with Scott feeling a bit disconnected from his religion. He realizes that although he grew up as a Jew, he doesn't practice any of their traditions, nor does he know any scripture or advice to pass on to his son. Thus, on a mission to find himself, Scott gets his tuches to temple and ended up with a cute little father-son matching hat set. In the end, Scott connects with his heritage and everyone joins together for a nice Shabbat dinner.

Meanwhile, Kim is informed by her momager Kris that one of her best friends, Jonathan, has not only written a tell-all book about her, but he plans to sell the book anonymously so is not discovered. Kim decides to give Jonathan a chance to come clean. However, when he doesn't, Kim angrily bolts out of dinner. After a raging Twitter-war, Kim finally gets her hands on a copy of the infamous tell-all, only to find that the book would in fact promote and praise Kim for her business success. But was it too little too late to apologize? After getting the boot from Jonathan's place, Kim pours her heart into a forward for Jonathan's book. He receives a copy, sent by Kim's hubby and peace is restored in NYC.

But that's not all we got to see in this episode. Kris Humphries shows an interesting side of himself, proving that if he wants to have "friends" over, by golly, he is gonna! When the girls jet off to LA for work, Kris plans a house party, which is strongly discouraged by Scott. After countless arguments from Kris, Scott finally throws up his hands, saying do what you must, but don't be surprised if you wind up "single and lonely in Minnesota." (Spoiler much?) So a house party he throws, only to be discovered when Kim is sent pictures of random girls from their suite. Kris finally comes clean, perhaps too clean, and gets off scott-free with the misses. Something tells me Humphries has a few more shenanigans up his sleeve. Maybe Kim should have read If You Give A Mouse A Cookie...

The Good: Jonathan's virtue was restored! I have to admit, I was nervous that I would never see him the same way again. I was also happy to see how mature and solid Scott was in this episode. Not only did he discourage the party from the beginning, he took the blame for it when confronted by the girls! Scott definitely got an A+ in this one.

The Bad: Kourtney came off very unsupportive when Scott deliberated trying to get back to his Jewish roots. There was a chance for her to step up and be there for him for something very personal, but instead she made him feel more alone than ever.

*Next week, we see Kris questioning poor Jonathan's sexuality. *Sigh* Humphries, you're making it harder and harder to like you. Stay tuned!

Movie Review: Julie & Julia

2011-01-23T20:22:00.000-08:00

Tonight I watched Julie & Julia and must say it left me...hungry. I must admit, I was not expecting to be entertained by a film about cooking, but was happily surprised. It was more a story about a writer that has lost faith in herself only to regain it when she tried something new.

The film, directed by Nora Ephron, is based on two true stories, shown simultaneously: one set in 1949, the other in 2002. Julia Child (Meryl Streep) has been placed with her husband in Paris, where her search for "something to do" leads her to discover the art of cooking. But more importantly, French cooking. Inspired by her love of French cuisine, Child finds herself the only female student of a top-knotch French cooking class, and eventually, the author of "Mastering the Art of French Cooking."

Julie Powell (Amy Adams) is a writer in search of a muse. After having abandoned her unfinished novel, her day job leaves her feeling unappreciated, while her new apartment in Queens leaves a lot to be desired. In a snap decision, Powell decides to write a blog. However, there's a twist. She will not only cook every recipe in Julia Child's cookbook, but she will do so in one year. In total, the quest requires over 500 recipes in just 365 days. As she progresses in her journey, Powell begins to see more and more people keeping up with her blog.

For me, some of the best parts of the film were Powell's failures. Her breakdowns were true to life representations of the frustrations of learning something new. As Child stumbled over her French, Powell stumbled over Child's recipes. Still, both ladies remained charming even through their lowest points.

Meryl Streep never ceases to amaze in her ability to adapt to whatever role she comes across. Her character was all at once strong, humorous and vulnerable. Stanley Tucci (Julia's husband, Paul Child) was a perfect complement. Of course, the film would not have been what it was without heart of Amy Adams. Her performance was a joy to watch and experience along with her.

Of course, as I mentioned before, the film wasn't so much about cooking as it was the experience of daring to try something new and simply dive into it. While Child succeeded in proving to the world that an American can write a French cookbook, Powell proved to herself that she could write. When she's just about given up, a hefty book and a year of delicious cuisine pulled her out of her fear of failure. It's like trying to poach an egg for the first time. You think you're never going to get it. But if at first you don't succeed...

Movie Review: Eat, Pray, Love

2010-09-03T11:26:00.000-07:00

The other day, I finally got to see the film Eat, Pray, Love starring Julia Roberts . In fact, I saw it alone.

Now from what I've gathered, most people these days are afraid to go to the movie theater by themselves. They assume that the whole world is shaking its head saying, "Alone? Really? You mean you don't have anyone to go with you?"

Up until a few years ago, I was the same way. Then the film Love in the Time of Cholera came out. Nobody wanted to see it with me. I resolved myself to waiting until it came to DVD. Then I realized that not having any friends that were interested in seeing a particular movie was not going to stop me from seeing it. I swallowed my pride and took myself to the movies. I even bought myself some popcorn, which I thanked myself for heartily.

This year, the same situation arose in the wake of Eat, Pray, Love's debut. Having read the book, I was not about to miss its version on the Big Screen. So I went alone. Let me just say that if you are going to choose one film to see by yourself, this is the one. It's a story about Liz Gilbert, a recently-divorced woman tired of trying to please everyone and takes a year to celebrate herself. She travels to Italy, India and Indonesia and learns not only a new language, but the ability to relax and simply breathe.

My favorite part of the movie was her living in Italy. I laughed out loud when she learned to "talk with her hands" the way the Italians do. I also loved Liz's decision to stop worrying about gaining weight and just enjoy her food. Rome was simply gorgeous. It made me want to pack my bags immediately and begin my own excursion. Of course, each setting in the movie was captivating and encapsulated the inner journey Liz was taking.

And then there is the wonder that is Javier Bardem, who first inspired me with his performance in Woody Allen's Vicky Cristina Barcelona. Bardem made the perfect romantic lead for Roberts in this film. Patient, kind and a world-traveler, he was everything she always knew she wanted, but is just discovering that she needs.

When the credits rolled, I felt like I had just taken a trip around the world. After peeling myself from my seat, I made my way back out of the theater. On my way past the concession stand, I saw one of the employees smile and wave goodbye. I smiled back and took it as congratulations for my brave, solo endeavor to the movies.

Season Finale of Plain Jane

2010-09-01T19:38:00.000-07:00

I've just finished watching the season finale of Plain Jane and wanted to share my overall opinion on the new CW show. To begin with, I was happily surprised by Louise Roe, their choice for the host. After watching her on several episodes of The City, I quickly grew to like her cool, classy and feminine style. In this series, Roe intended to take regular "plain Janes" and turn them into confident, stylish young woman who were finally able to capture the heart of their secret crush.

Throughout the past six episodes, we have seen a variety of girls who lacked the confidence, know-how and mere nerve to achieve their goals and tell the boy of their dreams what they really think of them. In tonight's episode a young, previously 270-pound girl was transformed from the "wing-woman" into the all-star leading lady. Not only did she gain confidence and self-respect, but a new boyfriend! Throughout these past episodes, Louise successfully paired up the majority of her proteges and provided viewers with an entertaining and inspiring hour-long episode each week.

What I love most about this show is the innocence of it. These girls are going out on a limb to bare their insecurities and, most importantly, their hearts to their crush (not to mention the world). It takes some serious guts to do what they are doing. Louise takes the girls through their biggest fears, offering them a chance to overcome them in an effort to gain the courage to reveal their crush. After, she helps them pick out a new wardrobe and gives them a makeover. In the end, their confidence sky-rockets and most of them end up finding love.

I seriously hope the CW brings Plain Jane back for a second season. Girls need to be reminded to take risks every now and again and that, yes, they are worth the trouble. So many people today play it too safe and, as a result, are always wondering "what could have been?" Thanks to this show, I have certainly gained a new perspective on one's own style, self-respect and the value of taking a chance.

Regarding Henry: a movie with a message

2010-09-01T14:12:00.000-07:00

Last night, I perused the list of iTunes choice tear-jerkers and stumbled across the '91 film, Regarding Henry. Directed by Mike Nichols and starring Harrison Ford, this film reminds viewers of the importance of family in an ever-ambitious world.

The film begins as Henry Turner, a top-knotch Boston lawyer wins a case involving a diabetic elderly man and a hospital, his client. Right from the start, we see what this man is all about when he hands his cigarette to his assistant to dispose of. His wife Sarah, played by Annette Benning, is just as consumed by this world of status and privilege as Henry is. Their daughter, however, doesn't quite seem to fit and gets punished for accidentally spilling juice on their grand piano.

Things take a drastic turn when Henry leaves the house to get a pack of cigarettes and in shot in the head. Miraculously, he survives, but is forever changed. Henry has lost his memory as well as his ability to move or speak. Now, basically an infant, he must re-learn all the basics of life. As Henry begins his life over again, he gains a new perspective of his family, his job, and what it means to be a decent person.

I found this movie highly enjoyable. To watch such a confident, respected lawyer reduced to an immobile man-child was a heartbreaking and sobering experience. The message of the film was clear: those who do not appreciate nor respect their blessings in life will eventually be humbled one way or another.

While Harrison Ford's performance was exceptional, I would have to admit that it was Mikki Allen who stole the show. The innocence of her character and the tender way she helped her father learn to read Are You My Mother? melted my heart.

Regarding Henry is an inspiring reminder to stop and smell the roses and that, when all else is gone, love remains. I would definitely recommend this film to anyone needing a fuzzy, warm, and heartfelt movie that provides a serious reality check. Note: a box of Kleenex and a loved one nearby are not a bad idea.

Lulu: A New Way to Beat the System

2010-08-21T14:09:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I discovered the wonder that is Lulu.com. After spending months trying to find someone to publish my short stories, I have found this little gem. Lulu allows you to self-publish your own stories. Even better, it sells them for you!

Since yesterday, I have already published two short stories. Holding the Bag is a crime/adventure about a trouble-making brother coming back to town, much to the dismay of his younger brother. The two rob a coffeehouse, where everything goes downhill from there.
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The Water's Edge is about a young girl who, just after losing her mother, falls in love. However, she's holding on to a secret about herself, afraid it will ruin her new romance.

The greatest thing about Lulu? I've never felt more inspired to write. Before now, I had felt that the majority of my writing would stay cooped up in the hard drive of my computer forever as I waited in vain for publishers to accept it. Now, I feel like a woman trying artificial insemination for the first time. Forget The Man, I can get this baby made all by myself.

Turns out I can bake the cake and get paid for it, too. Well, hopefully, anyway. I just have to sit back and wait for folks to start buying. But in the meantime, at least I now feel a better sense of control over my destiny, knowing that my words are out there.

Chris L. refuses Bachelor gig?

2010-08-20T11:50:00.000-07:00

After Bachelorette Ali Fedotowsky chose her new leading man, Roberto, she left runner-up Chris Lambton heartbroken and confused. The only upside to being the lovable reject of ABC's The Bachelorette? According to E! Online, Chris was recently asked to become the next Bachelor. An honor, they said, he refused.

Apparently, Chris is ready to get back to his everyday life away from the camera crew and gossip sites. Can't blame the guy. Getting dumped on national television has to be tough. Having to watch it back while others comment on "what went wrong" is like pouring lemon juice into a paper cut.

Still, producers say that this isn't necessarily the end of it. The E! source claims that some of the top Bachelors have refused their first request. Perhaps they can get nice-guy Chris to step back into the spotlight for round two? If so, I'll definitely keep my fingers crossed for a much happier ending for him this time around.

Toy Story 3

2010-06-30T14:28:00.000-07:00

Last night, a friend and I went to see Toy Story 3. I laughed, I cried. Well, I'll just say it: Disney & Pixar have certainly done it again.

From the very beginning, this film has an undeniable ability to pull at the heartstrings. The plot begins with Andy having just graduated from high school. Now that he is moving out of the house and headed to college, the toys are forced to ask the question, what happens next? With a few twists and turns along the way, the gang end up at Sunnyside Daycare. All appears happy and beautiful. That is, of course, until the toddlers arrive and beat the cotton stuffing right out of them. The toys must then find a way to bust out of their "sunny" prison and get back home.

What I love most about the Toy Story films are their ability keep you in suspense while offering plenty of laughs along the way. Though the "homeward bound" plot isn't exactly novel, it is presented in a new and refreshing way that reminded me of why I fell in love with the first two films.

When the last shot of our heroes appeared on the screen, I was left with a bittersweet nostalgia. It reminded me of the time I parted with my favorite stuffed cat when I was six.

As the credits began to roll, my inner child shed a tear as I bid goodbye to some of my all-time favorite toys.

Novel Excerpt: Prologue

2010-06-26T16:33:00.000-07:00

Recently, I found myself reading through the short novel I wrote just two semesters ago. I suppose I thought that after pouring my heart and soul into this thing for months that I would be sick to death of it. Surprisingly, I wasn't. Somehow I transformed from the writer into the reader and was able to appreciate my story in a new and exciting way. Whether published or not, I will always have this novel to look back and remember the most challenging, yet rewarding, project I undertook in my career as a student.

Without further ado, I am posting the prologue of my short novel, "Lift."

Prologue

"Wynter? What an unusual name."

It's a line I've heard hundreds of times from one of the many admirers of my best friend and it happens every time we go to a bar. In fact, it happens every time we go anywhere. I can almost quote her exact response.

"Yeah, my mom was going through a hippie-phase and I unfortunately am forced to suffer the life-long consequences."

"Not at all," replies the poor dolt in the black button-down with the I'm-trying-too-hard dollop of gel in his hair. "I actually think it's beautiful. So are you."

Gag me. It's a conversation I've had to witness over and over again my entire life. It's usually followed by Mr. Shiny asking if she'd like to join him at his table. My best friend then politely declines.

"I'm actually here with my friend Kate," she says. "It was nice to meet you, though."

The hopeful yet delusional man then walks away with a look that often gives me the impression that he'll be heartbroken for the next several days.

I'm so accustomed to this ritual because Wynter and I have been best friends since we were kids. We attended the same school since second grade, when she moved to my town: Tulsa, Oklahoma. We attended the same schools up until we graduated high school four years ago. I was there for the awkward years when we would shop together for acne cream-cleanser and rubber bands for our braces and I witnessed her at 15, when she turned into a Scarlett Johannsen look-alike.

It was then that she got her first boyfriend, Bobby Williams. They went out together for almost two months. Poor guy. He was crushed to the bone when Wynter started dating star basketball player Tom Bateman. They went out for a good six months until she decided she liked the artsy type and broke up with him for a guy who liked to paint pictures of her face all over his living room walls. I forget his name.

Looking at Wynter, I can see what entices them so. Long and lean, she has the figure of an ice skater with the curves of Selma Hayek. Though she's lived in the South her entire life, you would think she was a pure California girl because of her natural tan and long, silky, blonde hair. I, on the other hand, am another story entirely.

I guess you could say I'm average all the way. Really. I'm an average 5'4", wearing an average size 7 shoe, with average brown hair. The one attribute I can say I'm proud of would be my eyes. If anyone can ever tear their attention away from Wynter, they'll usually notice my big, bright-green eyes. Still, they're nothing compared to the deep-blue of Wynter's, which, I'm told, guys often get lost in.

Though I'm not stunning like Wynter, I guess I can be glad that at least I'm not fat. Having taken ballet lessons since I was five, I was able to maintain a fast metabolism, though I've never been able to shake the fact that my hips are slightly bigger than the average ballet dancer. It's actually because of my ballet dancing that Wynter and I are at one of our favorite bars tonight. We're celebrating my last night in Boresville, Oklahoma.

"I still can't believe you're leaving me," says Wynter. "I can't blame you though. I mean, Julliard? Geez, are you the luckiest person in the world or what?"

"I know," I reply. "I guess four years of living in the middle of nowhere finally paid off. At least I had time to perfect my dancing."

Though I had planned on getting the hell out of here after high school, I ended up staying for the last four years, saving up with the money I made working a variety of part-time jobs while Wynter attended college and focused on her social studies major--outside the classroom that is.

"I don't know what I'm going to do without you," says Wynter, playing with her long hair. From the back of the bar, I see a man staring at her.

"You'll be fine," I reassure her. "You still have that one guy. What's his name, Jim?"

"John," She replies, sighing. "Yeah I guess so. Just promise me you'll keep me updated on absolutely everything. Especially when some gorgeous New Yorker comes and sweeps you off your feet."

Ha. Wynter has a habit of thinking everyone is as lucky as she is in the dating-department. I guess she forgets that the last boyfriend I had was two years ago.

I use the term boyfriend loosely. The truth is we had a minor encounter in one of the bedrooms at a friend's kegger. We saw each other a couple of awkward times after that.

I have since come to accept the fact that not everyone is the dating type. Sure, I'll eventually have to get married and have kids to help keep the world populated, but the closest I believe I'll come to finding a soulmate is watching Johnny Depp in Finding Neverland and wishing he weren't married to that stupid model/actress whatever-her-name-is.

Wynter and I reminisce, sipping cocktails until we are greeted by our third male-visitor this evening.

"How are you ladies doing tonight?" asks the tall man with a buzz-cut. He looks fresh out of boot camp. His eyes are fixed on Wynter. "Wow, you are gorgeous. Can I get you a drink?"

"Thanks, but I'm actually seeing someone," Wynter says. "This, however, is my beautiful and single friend Kate. Have you two met?"

"Justin," says the tall man, giving me a quick once-over. "You know, I actually have a friend waiting on me. It was nice to meet you both." He gives one more look at Wynter and walks to the back of the bar where I see him greet a group of girls, none of whom giving him the slightest glimmer of recognition.

Figures.

"I really wish you wouldn't do that," I say.

"What do you mean?" Asks Wynter.

"This is my single friend Kate? You may as well put out an ad for me in the paper!" I say, frustrated. "Besides, did you see the way he high-tailed it out of here? Face it, Wyn, no admirer of yours is ever going to settle for me."

"Oh, that guy was an ass," says Winter. "You deserve way better, anyway. And you're going to find it in your fabulous new city life."

I have to admit, she has a point, but not about the guy part. I actually am looking forward to a fresh start in New York City. Though I'm sure that I'm going to miss my friend beyond words, at least there I'll be able to live a life free from Wynter's shadow. Who knows? Maybe I'll even find my own happy ending.

2010-03-22T15:07:00.000-07:00

Many relationships are not meant to last. Heck, most of them nowadays end in tears and screaming. Recently, I reached the point where I knew it was time to move on. I'm talking about my relationship with my computer.

Having gotten fed up with my PC and its tantrums and constant need of my attention to fix every minor problem it encountered, I decided that I needed a change in my life. With that, I purchased a Mac.

I'll admit that, like every new relationship, it has been a bit of a struggle. I find myself constantly asking questions, trying to "figure it out." I wonder why it won't allow me to watch my favorite television shows online and I definitely don't feel comfortable enough to eat greasy food around it.

Then there are the high points. To begin with, I'm head over heels about its shiny exterior and light weight. Not to be superficial, but my PC could've stood to lose a pound or two. Consequently, I'm no longer ashamed to bring my computer around my friends.

All in all, my new Mac has made my life a lot more enjoyable. And when you get right down to it, isn't that what relationships are for? Dare I say it? I've got a good feeling about this one.

Movie Review: Valentine's Day

2010-02-22T12:05:00.000-08:00

Last weekend, I had a choice: stay home and mope over my single status or grab some friends and celebrate our free lifestyle and general awesomeness. I chose the latter and my two girlfriends and I went to see the Movie du Mois, Valentine's Day.

I found this movie extremely enjoyable for several reasons. First, it was relatable. Jessica Biel's character was a perfect representation of what all single girls experience this time of year. A single workaholic, she detests nothing more than V-Day because it reminds her of the one thing in her life that she still hasn't quite figured out. To provide some feeling of comfort, or perhaps empowerment, she hosts a I Hate Valentine's Day dinner each year.

In addition to Ms. Biel's character, the movie also included several other true-to-life situations including infidelity, marital problems, and even young, ignorant love. What captured me was the way the film set up perfect hollywood moments and then let reality come into play, causing major disappointment for a few of its characters. Though there was the occasional cliche, the film did a good job of portraying a little of what everyone experiences in love and, particularly, on Valentine's Day.

The ensemble cast included Jennifer Garner, Patrick Dempsey, Jessica Alba, Taylor Lautner and Queen Latifah to name just a few. The brilliant chemistry between the actors added to the movie's general likability.

Though it may not have been the most riveting cinematic experience since Die Hard, I do believe the film did an excellent job of sticking to its basic element, which is what everyone experiences on this day. Some have a fancy dinner, some get engaged, and some just curl up under the covers, waiting for it to all be over.

I laughed, I cried (well, not actually, though I did have a bit of a sniffle near the end), and I experienced the love and sometimes heartbreak we feel on this day of intense pressure and high expectations.

Ultimately, Valentine's Day reminded me that we all have the occasional struggle on this particular day. If in the end, we manage to find someone special to spend it with, the struggle may well be worth it.

10 Little Things to Love About Christmas

2009-12-20T15:53:00.000-08:00

1. Watching all the old Christmas movies they still play on TV this time of year. Who can resist the leg lamp scene in A Christmas Story?

2. Driving around in your warm car to see the tiny bulbs beautifully illuminating trees and houses. What could be more a more peaceful break from studying for those stressful finals?

3. All the fancy holiday drinks that come out this time of year like Starbucks’ peppermint mochas and Sonic’s holiday blasts.

4. It’s the perfect opportunity to buy anything you’ve been too embarrassed to buy yourself and claim that you’re buying it for a friend. They’ll most likely believe you.

5. Sure, Christmas is about sharing with those you love, but why not take advantage of those amazing deals and buy yourself a little something? After such a busy semester, you certainly deserve it.

6. With the invention of the term “holiday weight,” we are given permission to eat whatever we want. Go ahead and take that dessert, no guilt for you!

7. I don’t care how many times I go see A Christmas Carol and The Nutcracker, I still enjoy renting the DVD or going see the stage production of these traditional favorites every year. They don’t call it tradition for nothin’.

8. Dumping a handful of spare change into the red bucket outside of Walmart. This simple act of kindness is sure to give anyone a boost.

9. Having an excuse to get all dolled up for the many holiday parties this time of year. Throw out the snow boots and bring on the heels!

And finally…

10. You know you love them. You hear yourself whistling them in class and humming them in your car. They’re the many Christmas carols that some pretend to hate, but in reality, they offer an outlet to get out the little bits of excess joy. With so much to love about the holidays, who can blame you?

Is it time to stop wishing?

2009-12-03T22:13:00.000-08:00

Just the other day I was strolling through memory lane while looking at some of my old stuff at my parents' house. I do this quite often, actually. I love that nostalgic feeling I get when looking at old photos and letters from old friends. I find it kind of amusing when I read ones that say "We'll be best friends forever!" and I sit and think, who is that girl?

Anyway, in this particular search I ended up finding my senior memory book from high school. My English teacher had made us write about twelve different essays on various topics about our life up until that point and we had to accompany the essays with photos. The first few pages are filled with photos of myself and my sister as a baby. The latter was actually accidental; my sister and I looked far too similar as babies. The rest of the book is full of humorous stories and anecdotes, some of which I can't believe I revealed to my English teacher.

Flipping through the pages, I started to think, have I changed at all? Don't get me wrong, in some ways I have. For starters, my writing has greatly improved. Some of the gramatical errors I made in that book are just plain embarrassing. In fact, I can't believe they got past my English teacher. I mean, really, where was her head? But that's another blog post entirely.

At the end of the book, she had us write an epilogue revealing what our dreams and hopes for the future were. We were supposed to explain how we planned to pursue them and where we saw ourselves in the next ten years. I had written about my aspirations toward becoming someone in the entertainment industry. I wanted to either act or write film scripts. As for how to get there, I didn't have a clue.

Now, four years later, I'm about to graduate college. Now, instead of being forced to make a college memory book, I'm writing a resume. Instead of filling it with funny stories and photos, I'm jamming experiences and qualifications into a single page. Though not as fun as scrapbooking, it still forces the pressing question, what am I going to do with my life?

I may have learned a lot over the past four years, but one thing about me remains the same. I'm still that wishful kid looking at photos of the Statue of Liberty, hoping that one day I'll get to actually see it up close. I still watch the credits at the end of the movie dreaming that someday it'll by my name that's scrolling to the top.

Even though the econony is the way it is and my career advisor is telling me with a stern expression to face the facts and get a managing position somewhere, I can't let go of that little girl inside of me. Now that my education is almost at its end and the need for money is becoming more and more pressing, I'm beginning to see flashes of the reality that awaits me. It sure ain't the one I always dreamed of.

Though I don't want to give up the dream, I can't help but feel that at some point, everyone in their life went through this. They had some unrealistic dream they were clinging on to and when the pressure really came down hard, they were forced to let it go. Maybe they were better for it.

So here's the question: is it time to let go? Do I face the facts and play with the cards that were dealt to me? One thing is for sure, the thought of looking back after fifty years of a well-paid, yet uninteresting job pains me. I'd hate to have to look back at my former, hopeful self and say, "Sorry kid, your dreams meant nothing. I had to do what I had to do. You'll understand when you're older."

So in this way, I am exactly the same as I was when I was seventeen years old and graduating from high school. I'm still confused, still full of questions. But there's one thing that I suppose I should be extremely grateful that I still have. Maybe this is the time when it'll come in handy, now more than ever. I'm still hopeful. And this, whether or not it's silly and juvenile, is what got me through the last twenty-one years, so maybe it'll get me through the next twenty-one.

Giving Back for the Holidays

2009-11-26T09:38:00.001-08:00

It's Thanksgiving and with it comes the pressing need to compile Christmas lists, eat tons of food and venture out into the madness of Black Friday. While these are all holiday traditions I enjoy, something about this time sends me into a funk each year. First, there is the recitation of things that I don’t really need, yet I am asking people to buy them for me. Second, I can’t help but wonder if the table loaded with food for my family of eight could feed a small village somewhere. Don’t get me wrong, I love the holidays and I love that joyful feeling in the air. However, I can’t help but wonder, have we begun taking it all for granted?

This got me thinking back, back to the origins of the holidays when Thanksgiving really was about spending time with your family and expressing gratitude for the blessings of one’s life. I started thinking about the scene in Little Women when the girls are each given a dollar for Christmas and then turn around and use it to buy gifts for their mother. Now, it’s hard to find a Christmas that hasn’t had hundreds, if not thousands of dollars poured into it.

Perhaps I’m getting ahead of myself. It’s not that I want to see people go without for the holidays, rather, I wish we could share the experience with others who are not as fortunate. On that note, I would like to see the holidays become a time about giving, not just to family and friends, but to the community and strangers that need our help.

Today, there are so many ways to get involved in charitable activities. To begin with, why not go through the closet and bag up some of the clothes you’re never going to wear again? Be honest: what’s it been, a year or two? Norman has a Good Will on the corner of Lindsey and 12th Street. The holidays are an excellent time to give those unwanted clothes to someone who will use them.

Have some extra time on your hands? Why not volunteer at a soup kitchen or mentor an underprivileged child? If you’re looking for a more hands-on approach, Cleveland County Habitat for Humanity is always looking for volunteers to help in any way that they can. United Way also has many local opportunities for those willing to volunteer their time and energy to make a difference in someone else’s life.

Even the smallest act such as donating a few cans of vegetables to a food drive can make a difference in how someone else will spend their holidays. Personally, I would like to show my thankfulness this year not by indulging in another helping of pumpkin pie, but making sure someone else gets a slice.

Singles vs. Couples: Can we co-exist?

2009-11-17T20:24:00.000-08:00

It's something that's been driving me nuts lately. It's the question that seems to be haunting so many friends, siblings and roommates alike, though they may not even realize it. It nags at you in back of your head when you wonder why your friend seems to constantly choose time with her boyfriend over you. You wonder why it has to be that way. You ask yourself, can't we all just get along? Sadly, the answer may be 'no.'

Speaking as a single, I know exactly how frustrating it is to be disregarded for a boyfriend time and time again. I also know what it's like to be anywhere near a PDA-obsessed couple; the smooching noises sometimes find their way into my dreams. I live in an apartment with a roommate whose boyfriend basically lives with us and I sometimes I want to strangle him. All in all, I know the ups and downs of the frustrating life of the single girl putting up with all those couples.

Recently, I had a thought. Could it be that couples are often just as frustrated with us singles? After all, singles are often the ones asking the couples to tone down the PDA. We're often the ones demanding that our friend spend the night away from her boyfriend and spend it with us. And usually, we're the ones telling her to dump the loser.

So how do they respond? By trying to couple the singles. I don't know how many times a friend has tried to hook me up with one of her boyfriend's friends in the hopes that we would hit it off. I used to think that it was purely out of the kindness of her heart. While to some extend this may be true, I now realize that they were efforts to bring us all the same level. Because if you think about it, wouldn't that make it all so much easier if we were all coupled off?

For that matter, what if we were all happily single? This is where retaliation from the singles comes into play. While the coupled friends are so busy trying to set us up on blind dates, we are trying to pull them away from their partners for girls night out in an attempt to remind them of the freedom of singledom. When the boyfriend does something shady, we try to convince her to break up with him. Not to say that we don't want what's best for her, because we do. Don't get me wrong. We want her to be happy. But who's to say that secretly, subconsciously, we don't think that her life and ours would just be easier if she was single like us?

So here's the big question: with everyone trying to assimilate everyone else into their own category, can singles and couples every co-exist harmoniously? As of now, I can find no evidence to support the assumption that this is possible. Perhaps the only solution is to silently withdraw to separate corners.

On the surface, this is a depressing thought. After all, we want to get along. That's why we spend so much effort trying to level the playing field. However, maybe everyone would be happier if instead of trying to change each other, we took a step back and accepted them for what they are. Maybe the singles just need to understand that their coupled friends have floated off into that shiny land above the clouds. Rather than try to bring them back to the single world, they should just accept it, move on and make more single friends. On the other end, couples could stop trying to "cure" us from our singleness.

In essence, we can all just agree to disagree. I'll stand on my side and you stand on yours. Maybe then we can all finally get along.

Steve Ward offers single women (like me) some tough lovin'

2009-11-16T20:03:00.000-08:00

Vh1's hit reality show Tough Love is back for another season, giving host Steve Ward a brand new set of girls needing his brutal honesty to help them find a man. The show is designed to help single ladies in search of love find out what it is that is preventing them from finding a serious relationship. Ward uses a bootcamp technique where he puts the ladies in situations designed to help them re-evaluate the messages they send to men all the while trying to set them up with suitable bachelors.

This season, we are given a few of your standard, stereotypical singles: the woman just wanting a ring on her finger, the gold digger, and the woman too focused on her career to spend any time searching for a man. We are also given a few unique cases such as a fat-woman-gone-thin who can't seem to let go of her insecurities, a 30-something year old bartender who wants to quit the partying and settle down, and then there's the crazy rocker lady who, quite frankly, I believe is a little beyond Steve's help (no offense, Steve). An alumnus of the first season will also be returning to finish the journey she began last season.

This season looks like it's going to be an exciting and enlightening experience for the contestants and the viewers alike. Ward is sure to bring some excellent advice from a male perspective that will hopefully prove useful to the single ladies out there who just don't get what they're doin' wrong. Personally, I plan to watch every episode with pen and paper in hand.

Best Villains Ever

2008-12-10T19:50:00.001-08:00

So I decided to dedicate a post to some of my favorite villains of all time. This list is not restricted to movies, but includes books and tv shows as well.

The Phantom (Phantom of the Opera) - I chose this character based on both Gerard Butler's performance in the film as well as the novel by Gaston Leroux. What I love most about this particular villain is the way the reader/viewer can't help but feel sorry for him after everything he has done. He was mistreated as a child because of his deformity and has grown up alone, hating the world. Though he murders several people, one cannot help but feel his agony and loneliness as he watched the one love of his life run away with another man.

Voldemort (Harry Potter) - Again I am basing my decision off of both the film version and the books. Why did I choose him? Voldemort is simply a bad ass. He is driven simply by his desire to be the most powerful man in existence and overcome anyone who tries to stand in his way. He is not driven by human emotions such as love or loyalty and it is debatable whether or not he ever really feels lonely. I love the way Voldemort is able to get inside people's heads and make the hero's goal seem virtually impossible. It makes the story so much more riveting.

Cruella De Vil (101 Dalmatians) - I love this villainess because she's simply crazy yet at the same time she has this sort of confidence that makes her seem stable. When I was little, I'm slightly ashamed to admit, I wanted to smoke just because she make that stick with the cigarette on it look so cool. I guess this is proof that movies do often influence kids in negative ways. I also just loved her swagger. While this chick was pretty messed up, I can't help but admire her just a little bit. I say this without any dislike towards animals, but at least she knew what she wanted and went for it!

Wicked Witch of the West (Wizard of Oz) - She is by-far one of the scariest women I have ever known. I'm sure it's something to do with her green skin, pointed features and voice simply dripping with malice. Even when she's just a normal woman in the beginning of the film, I have to say I am afraid of her. She just comes off so cold. Simply put, anyone who doesn't like little Toto must be evil.

Miranda Priestly (The Devil Wears Prada) - She's sort of like Voldemort in the way she puts her job before everything and doesn't let anything get in the way of her success, even her family. She has power, she has style and she doesn't mince words. This woman knows what she wants and always gets it.

Spencer Pratt (The Hills) - Wow, I don't even know where to begin with this guy. Most people call him a villain because he seems to puts his own needs before everyone else's. When his fiancee wants a big wedding, he convinces her to elope. When her sister is needing a place to stay, he kicks her out because he wants his couch to himself. Then there is the bundle of drama he creates nearly everyday, including making Heidi's mom cry, starting rumors about one of Heidi's closest friends, making his sister cry, and of course his numerous little quips that he has become infamous for. However, despite all of it, I can't help but tune in just to see what Spencer's going to do next. Whether it's posing as a screenwriter/agent, awkwardly stretching on the sidewalk, or making funny faces, I can't help but enjoy watching this Pratt.

2008-12-04T18:00:00.000-08:00

So I am preparing for my stay in France next semester and am definitely excited. I was recently lucky enough to win a travel fellowship that will cover the cost of my airfare. It goes to show that if you complain enough, good things will eventually happen to you!

My most recent conundrum is deciding when to actually leave. I've been told that I should get there early so I can travel around a bit before classes begin. I know that if I were to have to leave Paris an hour after landing, it would probably break my heart. Perhaps I'll just get somewhat inexpensive hotel there and stay a couple days before taking a train down to Clermont Ferrand.

I have been making a mental list of all the places I want to go while in Europe. After having seen P.S. I Love You, I am dying to visit Ireland. It looks to green and natural compared to the United States. Also, and it's a long shot, but maybe I could meet a Gerard Butler look-alike. You never know. I wonder if it's just the movie or if all Irish guys can sing.

If nothing else, I have to see Italy. I hope to spend a week traveling from Venice to Florence and then down to Rome. I am absolutely ecstatic to see the ruins of old civilizations. To walk around those ancient cities would probably feel like a fantasy world to a girl who has only lived in the Southern U.S. all her life.

In order to go on this trip, however, I have to travel all the way to Houston to get a student visa. Unfortunately, the process cannot be done over the phone or any other technology. I was told that it will be extremely irrating when, after my 14-hour drive, I go up to a little old lady who puts a stamp on my paper and sends me on my way. I suppose it's a minor inconvenience though, compared to the experience I'm going to have in Europe.

There's still so much to do, but I am definitely very excited!

Must-see upcoming films this season

2008-12-03T18:41:00.000-08:00

Now that the holidays are finally here, movies companies are pumping out films. What I like about winter movies is that unlike summer blockbusters, these films aren't all action-packed, but rather rely on drama and humor to provide more family-oriented films. I decided to blog a bit about a selection of movies that are now on my must-see list.

December 25th
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button- This film just looks enchanting, and not just because of its star, Brad Pitt. The movie is adapted from the novel by F. Scott Fitzgerald. In 1918, Button is born as an eighty-something year old man. He is the exact opposite of everyone else; as he gets older, his body grows younger. Essentially, he is aging backwards. This is a difficult concept for me to grasp, but I assume that while he is in his older body, he has the brain development of a child. He then matures as his body is in fact degenerating. It also appears that while he is the old man-child he makes friends with a girl. As the two go through their very different aging processes, they eventually meet up at roughly the same age and fall in love. I think this one will be a definite "thinker," but altogether enjoyable.

December 19th
Yes Man- While I don't think this will be an Oscar-worthy film, it definitely looks like one I'd go see for a good time with some friends. First of all, Jim Carrey is always entertaining. Second, while it is a comedy, I think this film might be a movie with a message. Carrey plays a man who goes through life negatively. One day, he is taken to a self-help program where he is told to start saying yes to everything. While the idea opens up a world of new and fun possibilities, it looks like there are definitely a few hilarious pitfalls along the way. All in all, it looks like a fun flick.

January 9th
Bride Wars- Starring Anne Hathaway and Kate Hudson, this movie is about two best friends that make a childhood pact to both get married at the Plaza. When they both get engaged at roughly the same time, they go to set the date at their chosen venue. The problems start when a mix-up occurs and they are both down for the same day. When neither woman is willing to sacrifice her spot, they engage in an all-out battle of the brides. One of the funniest parts in the trailer is when the women pick a date and the wedding planner asks, "Don't you want to consult the grooms?" The women simply smile and say a simple "No." It looks like those weddings where you almost wonder if the man will be standing in the church in the end since he has absolutely no part in the actual planning of the event. It may not have a lot of depth, but it definitely looks like it will provide for a fun time.

February 6th
He's Just Not That Into You- While this film's a bit further away, this is by far the one I am most excited to see. With actors such as Drew Barrymore, Ben Affleck, Jennifer Aniston and Scarlett Johansson, this film is based off of the best-selling book that I definitely intend to read. It looks like there will be multiple plot lines based on the relationships, and lack thereof, of several women. One is stuck with a boyfriend who doesn't want to tie the knot, another is attracted to a married man, while two other women are attempting to decode the dating mentality of today's single man. This one looks like it will inspire much conversation between men and women, or if no one else, myself and my gal pals. I have always been a fan of anything that exposes the differences between the genders and explores the various questions such as "Why didn't he call?" Well looks like the answer may be that "he's just not that into you."

Stretch out the pants, it's Turkey Day

2008-11-26T23:29:00.000-08:00

The time has come once again for us to gather with our families around our kitchen table and indulge in so much food that we must undo our belts before moving on to that third helping of that delicious pie that only Grandma can make. Ah yes, it is Thanksgiving: the only day that is socially acceptable to plan entirely around food.

There's just something about this holiday that makes me feel giddy. I wouldn't say that it's the green bean casserole or the stuffing, although those are definitely contributing factors. I think it's the fact that this is one time during the year when family is almost obligated to be together. It's that one time where everybody, no matter how far away they live, comes together to enjoy lots of food and each other's company.

My family has a tradition we uphold every year. We have our Thanksgiving meal after having cooked all together throughout the morning. Afterward, we put up our Christmas tree ridiculously early. Later, we go see a massive collection of Christmas lights that are put up by a church in our city. It's a simple, predictable day, but I find myself looking forward to that familiarity more and more as each year passes.

While this is the time of year that we are supposed to be giving thanks for all the wonderful things we have and the family members who love us, I think we tend to forget that. I think that we focus entirely too much on how many days we get to take off from school and what kind of food we'll be eating. Perhaps if we actually took a look at certain families all over the world who have so little, we could really appreciate what it is that we have. So this year I plan on fully-appreciating the many things that I am privileged enough to have such as my health, my education, my loving family and my friends. I am hoping to get back to the root of what this holiday was meant to be and put the "thanks" back in Thanksgiving.

Comparisons in Modern Vampires

2008-11-26T10:29:00.001-08:00

With all the hype about vampires lately, there has been much debate (and by this I mean between myself and a friend) as to what constitutes a vampire. Is the immortality? The fangs? There have been so many representations of vampires over the years that some people have found their favorite version and refuse to accept any other. While vampire legends have existed for millennia, I thought I'd spend some time exploring several different modern vampire myths.

For starters, we have Anne Rice series. Her vampires originated from the tale of a poltergeist which had terrorized the house of an Egyptian royal family. The restless spirit would prick the skin of his victims and through their blood, enter into them, making them crave the blood of others. In these books, a vampire can only be created if one is first bitten by a vampire, their blood has been taken and then they must also drink the blood of the vampire. Her vamps have pale, cold and hard skin, glowing eyes and sharp fangs. They have hightened senses and must stay away from the sun. They spend their days in coffins and come out only at night. Rice's vampires can only be killed by exposure to sun or being ripped apart and burned. The ashes must be scattered afterward. There are exceptions, however. The older the vampire is, he is more powerful and difficult to kill. It is debated in her books as to whether or not her vampires have souls.

Next, I would like to focus on the vampires in the TV series Buffy the Vampire Slayer. These vamps of course have heightened senses, superhuman strength and somewhat pale skin. These vampires appear human at first glance and only morph into their vampire-look when they want to. A characteristic which differs from other modern vamires is their ability to retract their fangs. As in Rice's books, in order to sire or create a vampire, one must engage in the exchange of human for vampire blood. Another similarity to Rice's books is the fact that they are tortured by sunlight and only go out at night. Buffy's vampires can be killed by sunlight, a wooden stake through the heart or decapitation. Since these vampires have no soul, they cannot touch anything holy such as a cross or holy water. However, in the show, it is possible, yet very difficult, for a vampire to regain his soul.

As for one of the newest vampire chronicles, Twilight, Stephanie Meyer's vampires are quite different than the two I just mentioned. These vampires can easily be mistaken for ordinary humans, apart from their exceptional beauty. While they have fangs, they are only slightly longer than one's normal teeth. Their eyes also change color according to how much blood they have had to drink. They have superhuman strength and heightened senses. A huge difference in this series is that these vampires are not harmed by sunlight. Still, the sunlight does affect them; it causes their skin to glow in a highly superhuman manner. Therefore, they avoid sunlight for fear of being exposed as vampires. They are killed only by being dismembered and their pieces burned. Unlike Buffy and Anne Rice's novels, these vampires are created by a simple bite. Through the bite, the venom from the vampire spreads throughout the victim, stopping his heart. It is debated throughout the series whether or not these vampires have souls. However, some of them are able to abstain from human blood entirely and live their lives "normally."

Of course these are only three versions of vampires out of the hundreds or thousands that have accumulated over the years. However, through these three alone, one can see certain characteristics that seem to stick with the idea of the "creature of the night."

The world may never get enough of Edward Cullen

2008-11-24T16:18:00.000-08:00

I recently went to see the movie Twilight and I am already planning to see it at least a half-dozen more times before it leaves the theatre. While it might sound better if I were to claim that my love for this film is due to its cinematic genius, who am I kidding? My enjoyment of the film is probably due in large part to the attractiveness of its cast. To be specific, I'm talking about Robert Pattinson who plays Edward Cullen and another favorite, Peter Facinelli who plays Carlisle Cullen. Sitting in the theatre, staring at such beautiful faces, reminded me of when I first saw Legolas in The Lord of the Rings and was absolutely determined that he was madly in love with me. Fortunately, I'm older and wiser now. I accept the fact that I can't have a relationship with a fictional character. Still, it doesn't hurt to dream.

Stepping away from the gorgeousness of Pattinson and Facinelli for a second, I have to mention a few of the film's merits, other than its casting. When I first heard there was going to be a Twilight movie, I was immediately skeptical, having read the books. I thought they could either ruin the story or make it so much better by adding a visual component to it. I was very pleased overall with how they managed to take all of the fluff from a novel and put it into a screenplay. Of course, there were parts that were changed or even left out entirely, but otherwise the audience would be sitting down for a five-hour film rather than two.

The editing was also quite impressive. In most films, the editor's job is to put all the pieces together in a very fluid manner so that the viewers don't even notice the transitions from shot to shot. The editor is the wizard behind the curtain. However, this film was a pleasant surprise. Several times, throughout the film, they would make a scene more dramatic by introducing highly-edited flashbacks. In my opinion, it made the scenes far more visually compelling.

I also have to mention the soundtrack. When I first heard that Rob Pattinson was recording "Never Think" for the movie, I thought, there's no way this is gonna be any good. As of today, I've probaby you-tubed it over a hundred times. At this point, Pattinson's talent seems almost lethal. The music and lyrics of the song perfectly capsulize what the story is all about: the mixed emotions of someone completely in love and yet terrified of what his presence will do in his lover's life.

All in all, I think that Catherine Hardwicke and her crew did a fantastic job of putting it all together. I'm sure that those that haven't yet read the books will be almost running to the bookstore. Rumors of sequels have already begun and all I can say is, as long as they keep Pattinson and Facinelli, I'm there.

So what's the deal with blogging?

2008-11-24T15:26:00.000-08:00

Since I've been feeling really lost on this point, I decided to dedicate a post to a question that has been bothering me for some time now. Why the heck do people blog and what is its purpose? Is it about self-expression, or is it more for informational purposes? Since I can't seem to think past my frustration on this topic, I'm blogging about blogging.

This blog I am doing for a class, but I'm wondering why other people do it. For that matter, how do they find that one thing that they're just dying to share with the public? When I first learned that I would have to create a blog, my first question was, what do I write? The answer I was given: anything! Well, that kind of answer doesn't suffice for a person such as myself. Some people find a sense of freedom in being able to talk about whatever they want. I like to be told exactly what to do and how to do it. Yes, I enjoy a little room for creativity, but when someone sets me completely loose on something I often get lost in a mess of my own thoughts. If I at least have some guidelines, I can find my way from there.

To find answers, the first step I took was to look at random blogs. I saw everything from ones dedicated to families to ones dedicated entirely to new movie releases. I even saw blogs that were set up to showcase one's artwork or sell their possessions. All these blogs seemed to have one thing in common: an over-riding theme of some sort.

Now here's another problem that gets me. I am incapable of picking a theme that I can stick with. You'd think it would be easy for a person who likes rules. Either I get bored easily or I just have too many passions, I can't be sure. Consequently, my blog may turn out as more of a journal than anything else. So I guess I'll just continue pouring out bits of randomness and maybe I'll find my niche along the way.

So what exactly is a blog? Perhaps I'll never know.

Attraction, Seduction, and a Little Mystery: The Pickup Artist Is Back!

2008-10-28T11:25:00.000-07:00

The Pickup Artist has finally begun its second season and I'm giddy to learn more of Mystery's rules of the game. Many people remain skeptical about whether Mystery's method actually works and wonder if he is just bamboozling us with his wit and collection of furry hats.

Personally, I remain a believer in the method and there are facts to back me up on this. First, Mystery showed in the first episode this season that he does not rely on his accessories to pick up women. He did this by taking all of them off and going into "the field" wearing only a t-shirt and jeans. Clearly the man is doing something right because people were still drawn to him like moths to the flame. Next, and I will admit it is slightly shameful, but several of the men in season 1 became increasingly more attractive to me the more successful and confident they became as the show progressed. As Mystery has said, social status plays a huge part in attraction. When someone is surrounded by a group of people, that person naturally looks more desirable than someone standing alone. The same goes for someone who walks into a room smiling and meanders around comfortably as if they own the joint.

Mystery's method is a collection of social pyschology and evolutionary principles as well as just good ol' common sense. It aggravates me when people say that the show's goal is to teach men to deceive women. That is not the case at all. Some men cannot even talk to a woman and once they finally muster up the courage, they are shut down. A lot of them just want to be able to find someone to love. As Mystery has said, women have invented a sort of game and the purpose of this show is to teach men the rules of that game. True, some men play just to sleep with a bunch of women. However, I think that for the men just looking for a soulmate, the process is entirely honorable.

As for the rules of the game, Mystery goes through the reasons that a man might get rejected when approaching a woman. He might come on too strong. This could translate as eager and desperate and thus, of low value. His body language could make the woman feel uncomfortable and want to rid herself of that feeling, even if the man is a good conversationalist. Also, the man could just be plain uninteresting. Most men simply interrogate their target (person of interest) with questions such as "Where are you from?" These are questions that will lead no where and only bore the woman, which is no way to try to begin any sort of attraction.

In the show, the men learn the proper ways to open a set such as using interesting openers and setting false time constraints so that women don't get uncomfortable with the question of how long this guy's gonna be here. He teaches proper body language such as leaning and rolling back to indicate a non-verbal false time constraint and willingness to walk away. This gives women a subconscious desire to draw the person back in for fear of losing his company.

Some women are extra defensive when it comes to allowing themselves to become attracted to a man. Mystery teaches that one must first momentarily "disqualify himself from being considered a potential suitor" by use of a "neg." A "neg" is a statement that briefly attacks the woman's ego. This would be something like "Introduce me to your friends; that's the polite thing to do." The man must also indicate his level of value by throwing out DHVs or Demonstrations of Higher Value. Through their DHVs men want to demonstrate things such as being a protector, someone who has been preselected by other women, an interesting person and ultimately someone who is successful.

There are clues that women send out to indicate their level of interest, which are called IOIs, or Indicators of Interest. These include touching their hair, scratching their wrist or even something verbal to indicate their attraction toward the man. It is the man's job read the IOIs correctly so he can know when to go in for the number or the kiss.

What I enjoy most about Mystery's method is how it deals with human behavior and not just the relationship between men and women, but the interaction between people in general. In this way, the show can be just as informative for females. Folks want to be surrounded by interesting, fun and successful people. When you stand with your feet together and hands in your pockets as if you're apologizing for your wasted space, you are telling the world that you have low value. The pickup artists teach how to convey a positive image that will transform not only one's romantic life but all areas of one's life. In this way, there is something to be learned by everyone and The Pickup Artist is an excellent tool for those seeking love, friends or just a positive self-image.

My long-term relationship with coffee

2008-10-14T12:13:00.000-07:00

I have been in a relationship with coffee for about seventeen years now. I think it's finally starting to get serious.

I first met coffee when I was three years old. My parents would give me small doses with large amounts of milk. As I grew older, the doses became larger as my craving for it grew. Now, nearly seventeen years later, I drink coffee multiple times a day. I believe I'm truly addicted.

Unlike other relationships that have come and go in my life, coffee has always been there for me and, though I don't want to jinx myself, I think we have many more years to come.

Now I won't lie, our relationship isn't always easy. There are days when I stay with a friend who doesn't even own a coffee pot, a tragedy that always perplexes me. Then there are others when I am simply out of coffee grounds and unable to drink a cup before my morning classes. These are the hardest days and I have to force myself to withhold my extreme crabbiness until I can get a cup of the delicious caffeinated beverage.

There was a period, a few years back, in which my addiction to coffee had me concerned about the ramifications it would have on my health. My mother, for example, had once gotten an ulcer from drinking too much during a particularly stressful time in her life. To safe my stomach, I decided to give up coffee for good. Well, it only lasted a month. It turned out that without coffee, I was like Jennifer Grey after she got her nose job. I wasn't the same person as before and I definitely wasn't happy. I quickly returned to coffee, which graciously accepted me back. We've been together ever since.

I often wonder if I will ever find anyone as good as coffee has been to me. When I wake up, it's the first thing I want to see. When I'm having a rough day, it always comforts me. Unlike men, coffee never gets jealous when you experiment with another beverage. There was a week once when I decided to expand my horizons and try Chai on the side. Coffee never held it against me.

A lot of women joke about winding up as an old maid living with a dozen cats. Not me. I'll be the one living happily while growing dozens of coffee plants in my backyard.

Sex and the City: Is this the end?

2008-09-25T11:17:00.000-07:00

Now that Sex and the City: The Movie is finally out on DVD, I plan to buy it as soon as my wallet will allow. I'm not going to deny the fact that I am a total fanatic of the show. I own nearly all the seasons and watch the reruns on TBS even if I've seen them fifty times. I can't help but wonder, what is it about this show that has kept me glued for so many years? For that matter, why do millions of other women love it so much?

It seems to me that those who have never watched the show seem to think that it's some sort of soft-porn. However, once they see an episode, they begin to realize that it's almost more of a documentary. The show covers the hard-cold facts (but in a highly amusing way) of what it's like to be a single woman living in New York City and for that matter, anywhere.

Yes, there is a lot of sex in the show and personally I think it's what makes Sex and the City so appealing. Some of the funniest moments happen when these girls are right in the middle of it. In one episode, a man that Miranda is sleeping with likes to watch porn during the act. At first, she's ok with it, but it starts to make her feel inadequate and she asks him to choose between the girls in the video and her. His answer is that he's been in a "relationship" with those girls for too long to let them go.

I often wonder if the circumstances the girls encounter are completely fictional, or some men out there are just unashamedly perverted. Even worse, perhaps some of them don't see anything unusual with their so-called "game" such as a man Charlotte sees who likes to slobber all over her face and claim that it's "his thing."

Of course it isn't just the men with the strange sexual desires. Enter: Samantha, the woman who's not afraid to tell you what she wants and when she wants it. I have to admit that Samantha is one of my favorite characters. Not only is it hilarious when some of her fantasies don't exactly play out as she intended them, but she has that confidence that I think all women would sell their kidney for if it was available for purchase.

In every episode there's some aspect that I can relate to and I think other women feel the same. Throughout the seasons I've come to know and love Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda. I've cried with them through their breakups and felt all warm and bubbly when they finally found "the one." It seems as though this movie may have wrapped up the storyline for these Manhattan women, but I for one and praying for a sequel. I'm just not ready to let them go.

If I were a superhero...

2008-09-04T21:13:00.000-07:00

So today I randomly started thinking about superheroes and how crazy awesome they are. I mean, everybody wants to be a superhero. There's just something about them, the feeling that they have a one-up on you. They have this certain thing that you don't have, be it flying, invisibility or strength, and it makes them superior and mysterious. Now what frustrates me is that nearly every superhero, once he/she figures out their powers, gets upset. Instead of being totally psyched like any other person would, they start griping about how they just want to be normal. I'm sitting here thinking, you just got what everyone wants! You just became a badass and you're griping?

If I were a superhero, I would be showing off quite a bit. The first thing I would do is show any kid that ever messed with me what's what. Then I'd have to say I would use my powers to make money. If I had the power of flight, I could maybe work for Amazon.com. Maybe then students could get their textbooks at a decent time. Of course after I was done making money I would help mankind and all that. I mean, that comes with the territory.

I have to say that I respect superheroes who have the willpower to stay anonymous. It must be tough not being able to tell everyone, "Hey, I'm the one who just stopped that guy from killing everybody." I commend heroes like Spiderman and Batman who hide their faces because don't need all the glory. However, I don't know what the deal is with Superman. That dude's clearly out to get some attention. Yeah yeah, he's got the whole Clark persona by day but do you seriously call a pair of glasses effort? I don't think he is actually trying to remain anonymous. I think he's saying "Come on, people. Seriously? It's me!" I can't really blame him because of course, I'd do the same thing. I mean what are superpowers without a bunch of people being jealous of you?

What's a financially independent student to do?

2008-08-26T18:20:00.000-07:00

Since this is my first official blog, I found it difficult to find a subject worthy enough of the title. Then it hit me, I'll complain about the lack of government funding for college students! That's a fun one.
Let's see...to begin with, I'll just say that my parents are giving me nothing to pay for school. That's right, zip. Therefore, in addition to the not-so-great salary at my part-time job, I'm basically relying on the mercy of others to hand me wads of cash. So far, it hasn't really worked out for me.
I can't claim myself as an independent for a few reasons and therefore the government expects my parents to help pay for school. Because of this, I can't get any grants. Believe me, I've tried and somehow they seem to think I just don't need 'em. Basically all I have left to do is take out a bunch of student loans. The funny thing is, I get this Student Aid Report and it sounds like I should be so excited that they're offering me thousands of dollars in loans that I'm going to have to pay back along with all the interest they accrue.
This may sound too easy, but can't someone just give me some money? I mean honestly, what is a student with basically no income supposed to do besides take out loans and just hope she'll be able to pay them back after school?
This leads me to wonder if this is why our economy is going down the drain. I mean, other than the war of course. Is the fact that universities are hoarding all this money while lowely college students such as myself struggle to pay it all back the reason that everything else is so expensive?
I mean if you think about it, it makes sense. The schools have all the money and so other companies get more and more poor and thus raise the costs of their items. In turn, college students that are already struggling to pay for school can't even afford bread anymore. This is what happens when the government refuses to give more students aid! I suggest that if America wants strong, healthy students as well as a stable economy they give out more aid to the students who are less than financially blessed.